Assalam o alaikum dear brothers and sister, I have a question regarding my sister in law which recently got married and we live in a joint family house meaning my mother, father, brother and his wife all live together. Is the marriage valid, and can she get a divorce? Islam is much more than a religion; it is a way of life. I have no friends here and have no one to speak too since I dont want to back bite or speak ill of my in laws to anyone. You have already hurt your wife and broken her trust by going behind her back and having an affair with her sister. What is the ruling in Islamic law regarding the limits of my relations with my sisters in-law (my wife's sisters)? Under Islamic Shariyah, it is purely the right of a wife to demand from his husband to have a separate home. Withdrawing a paper after acceptance modulo revisions? Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. Maybe write a list where you write down all the good characteristics you find attractive in your wife. Definition. His sisters are married and moved away. brother-in-law of hers. Get rid of everything that remind you of her such as pictures, clothes, messages etc. This is definitely wrong, but part of it is the fact that she sees your children all the time, so there are no formalities in the relationship. We should speak well to the slaves of Allaah until we meet Allaah. Mine isn't exactly a response but I just want to share what's happening to me maybe someone out there can help I am in a situation were I stay with my father in law and three brothers in law. We know that Islamic rules do not allow marriage with wife's sister. By clicking Accept, you consent to the use of cookies. Have set time for when you eatand eat healthily. Commented on: 1. She just does some things when my husband is at home. Is There a Solution to Nullifying Wudu When Touching My Wife? Below here Allah says in the Quran. How do I tell my parents I want to marry someone else? On one occasion, she tried to feed her infant child in the presence of my husband she didnt cover herself up. May Allah improve your situation, put love in your family and reward you for your sabr and efforts with your family, aameen. From the beginning, she never helped me with the tasks, she comes and goes as she wishes, but she comes at lunch time with everything ready. You must set boundaries with her, and so does your husband. It is a humane and Islamic duty to show the same love and compassion to younger siblings. First she couldnt understand why my husband gave me so much attention. When ever I approach my husband I speak softly and I never use disrespectfuly words. No matter how hard your situation is or whatever hardship you are going through, you should never end your own life or even think about it. I find in many families parents overstep their limits in finding a spouse for their child. The purpose of marriage in Islam is to establish a family. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary". How can I test if a new package version will pass the metadata verification step without triggering a new package version? i dont have to type anything all d abv comments said exactllllllllyyyyy what my problems r rite now. Can I masturbate after marriage if I'm not satisfied with my wife? Talk to your Mother or Father about this and ask them to advise her to cover herself better while in the home. Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors. . Do not divulge secrets. And she could stay with you and your wife under the conditions that you treat her like you would treat a foreign woman! This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. She has obtained her bachelor's degree in Sociology from Norway. A couple of months ago, I had to cut off communication with my 30-year-old brother. Like giving rice or other basic items for daily necessities and providing something useful like clothes or prayer tools. How can I detect when a signal becomes noisy? She took him to a doctors appt with her for a female thing. When she came, she used wear dupatta to cover her head. My Friend's Husband Walks Around in Pyjamas. The Prayer of Need (Salat al-Hajah) or Istikhara? If your children get married, the son-in-law and daughter-in-law will become your mahram, your mother-in-law, father-in-law, and even your grandparents in law, are your mahram. [Bukhaaree, Fath al-Baari, 9/330] Evaluating the limit of two sums/sequences. Treat yourself good and have positive thoughts about yourself. Is giving a discount based on sales target permissible in a business? I keep crying and asking Allah to help me out of this. She may have a very busy career or family situation, or there may be lingering jealousy issues. You mentioned that you tried speaking to your husband and he wouldn't listen. MIL manipulates the FIL, gives him hard time to do soething about it all the time plus when you have sister in law (SIL) at home, MIL and SIL fill each other in all the time only on the bad things and not the good things, plus add spices to it. What Can She Do? He created us to worship Him alone; therefore, it is an act of worship to know how to deal with people in your life. And suicide is not an option at all, as I mentioned above. It was reported from Uqbah ibn Aamir that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: Beware of entering upon women. A man from among the Ansaar said: O Messenger of Allaah, what about the brother-in-law? he said: The brother-in-law is death. (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4934; Muslim, 2172). And [also prohibited are] the wives of your sons who are from your [own] loins, and that you take [in marriage] two sisters simultaneously, except for what has already occurred. She behaves very strangely with me when we are alone, exposing her while coming from the bath and also making a lot of body contact with me. May Allah give you the willpower to stay away from ZIna. On this basis, it is permissible for him to accommodate you in a room of the house that has its own facilities, so long as there is no fitnah (temptation) or being alone with any non-mahrams who have reached the age of puberty. 6. This is incorrect. Why do you have to go to kitchen when she is cooking? It's also unwise to actively seek them out and interact unnecessarily. I am a young muslim woman who has been married for 3 years alhamdoelilah. However, if her sister passes away or he divorces her and she completes her iddah, it will be permissible for the other sister to marry her brother-in-law. Committing suicide would be another sin in Islam. Fathers/grandfathers and sons/grandsons are mahrams for his wife and it is permissible for them to be alone with her. This means that everyone usually gets along and that you support each other when things get tough. Whenever you think about her, remind yourself that you have a wife who loves you and gave you two wonderful children. You should never have been involved with her. Sibling inheritance laws and rights are clearly defined in California, and most U.S. states, by probate code intestacy laws. I have a question regarding my sister in law which recently got married and we live in a joint family house meaning my mother, father, brother and his wife all live together. I Am Getting to Know a Man for Marriage, but He Tells His Mother Everything. The only privacy is our room but in kitchen, dining, lounge and everywhere else there is no limitation. I thought maybe this can work. The Prayer of Need (Salat al-Hajah) or Istikhara? Allah (swt) says in the Quran: Forbidden to you (for marriage) are: two sisters in wedlock at the same time, except for what has already passed (4:23). It is not permissible for her to be alone with any of her in-laws except those who are so young that there is no fear that they will tempt her or be tempted by her. You are non mahram for her, i think you should discuss with someone in your family like mother. Do they have the right to know all the details about our life? Your brain will do the job for you if you are patient, In sha Allah. Rather what is meant is the brother, brothers son, paternal uncle, cousin, etc, who are not mahrams. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Guess Who? Whats the Punishment of Committing Suicide? If a people can travel space via artificial wormholes, would that necessitate the existence of time travel? Is it permissible to take a loan for business investment in difficult circumstances? Also im happy to see how concerned the brother is re: his interaction with his sis in law. You have a perfect right to feel as you do, by the way, but I just want you to be sure you are aiming your emotions, and your actions, at the right person. Source: This means under Muslim law, the legal right to inheritance of property arises only upon the death of the deceased and not upon the birth of the child. just generally , she will also get back in her own business , less distraction more time for self improvement. Ibn Katheer (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, discussing some of the husbands rights over his wife: Allaah has given the husband rights and commanded the wife to obey him; He has forbidden her to disobey him because of the fact that he excels her and maintains her. She lives in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, with her husband, daughter, and mother-in-law. The sanctity of your marriage comes first. I will try my best to advise you the best I can, In sha Allah. Al-Haskafi (may Allaah have mercy on him) one of the Hanafis said: Similarly, she is entitled to a place in the house that is free of his family and her family according to their means, as is the case with food and clothing. The patriarchal society makes a female's survival impossible without a male, where the latter has complete authority over the former. How can I be a better Muslim? like that my sister should share you with me." One cannot expect a family to live without any expense. If any of them enters your room with your permission but he is not one of your mahrams such as your husbands brother then there has to be one of your mahrams present, so that there will be no haraam khulwah between you (i.e., being alone together). Allah Says in the context of the women who are forbidden for marriage (what means): {and that you take [in marriage] two sisters simultaneously, except for what has already occurred. I completely disagree with Zara. Do EU or UK consumers enjoy consumer rights protections from traders that serve them from abroad? So you can not marry her unless until she . We can only advise you, but it is primarily something you will have to sort out yourself. - Get rid of everything that remind you of her such as pictures, clothes, messages etc. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". Is taking a commission from suppliers allowed as long as the company doesnt suffer a loss? Always improve yourself. It is so hard that I withdraw and go quiet untill eventually a couple days later I will breakdown and I will start telling him how I feel. She is got her own room, she is in her 20 ties, they are looking for boy for her, but still living since many years with them in same house. Your sister-in-law is actively striving to sabotage your . Do not forbid your spouse from seeing family unless you fear for their religion and safety. Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. This is when you see those young children dying in war and famine killing kids in Africa that I pray to god take me since im ready to go and spare of those childrens life for mine. But the big question is - Financialy are your'll able to stay on your own.? Questions cannot be asked through this form. The thing is she treats her own husband so bad. (c)Al-Kaasaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: If a husband wants to make her live with a co-wife or her in-laws, such as his mother or sister or daughter from another marriage or anotherrelative, and she refuses to accept that, then he has to provide her with accommodation of her own But if he lodges her in a room of the house that has a door of its own, this is sufficient for her and she should not ask him for alternative accommodation, because the harm caused by fear for her belongings and not being able to relax is no longer there. Log in, //